I seriously cannot get another thing in my fridge and cupboards but more importantly the "Treat draw" You know, that special draw that has your heart palpitating at the mere thought of opening it!
I have been wanting to dive into so many glorious things but have been told "That's not to be eaten until Christmas!" So I wonder when does the official Christmas window open and "Contraband" of many calories become fair game? For weeks now the goodies that are purely "Just for Christmas" have been staring at me, almost daring me to have a dip in, but I have resisted under the ruling of "The Roycey Wife Act of 1993"
I would argue that Christmas eve is a good call but I dare not challenge the "You cannot touch anything until Christmas day" house rule - Not even I am that brave!
I purchased my turkey yesterday who has been traditionally named as George and in line with the President of The United States of America I pardoned one in aisle 10 of my local supermarket - sadly It may have been a little late as I watched the ice drip from its headless body, but hey the thought was there!
George now sits on my side counter defrosting, I cannot walk past it without poking it a little just to make sure it will be ready for tomorrow, in truth I have no idea if it will be fully defrosted by then but the warm bath water is on standby and Gino's number at the ready for any Christmas Day emergency! The mad fact of this is I will not know if George is fully unfrozen until I stick my hand up it's arse, it's almost a game show format!
Tomorrow morning will see me take the "Gold Run" and whisper my same ole' joke "Top Middle or Bottom" as I place my hand up George's backside (Or is it neck hole, who knows!) to remove things I don't even want to know the name of and no doubt, like previous Christmas's before I will leave something inside that shouldn't be there, but what the hell, everything is edible right?
Potato's (Said in Keith Lemon voice) will be peeled, Brussels sprouts (Or Fairy cabbages as they are known in my house) will have crosses placed on the bottom of them (No me either!) mashed stuff will be mashed, gravy with be frantically mixed to come in on time with the rest of the meal, the table will be worthy of a John Lewis display, wine will sit chilled, a cork will get stuck, music will play and we will eat as one knowing George payed the ultimate sacrifice to keep me, my family, my guests on Boxing day and my dog for the next three weeks very very happy! (Before I get a hounded it will not be the bones for the dog! See what I did there!!)
I have this year excelled myself and made a special compartment in my wallet marked "Receipts" I know right, this is the stuff of legends although I am hoping my gifts purchased are not in need of a trip to the return department during the mid sale madness! I did not however excel myself at wrapping, maybe its just a man thing but I wrap like a man blindfolded, I just cannot get my head round the folding pointy bit at the end and as for wrapping a bottle, it just ain't going to happen thus my house will be a wrapped up bottle free area!
In years gone by Christmas has been so many things to me but this year it is different on so many levels, this year it is about nothing else other than "My true family" and has not one little bit got anything to do with me, my wants, my needs, my high expectations. I just want to be with my girls and "Be" that in itself is a miracle and one today I am so very grateful for.
Embrace every second and hold every moment and be thankful for what we have right now not what we want in days, months and years to follow, live in the moment and take just a small second out to look up and take it all in, it may not happen again.
Can I take this opportunity to wish you a peaceful, safe, drama free Christmas and if things go wrong as they no doubt will, embrace them, laugh at them, enjoy them, make it an positive experience and know the gift of love cannot be wrapped up, defrosted or placed in a special draw for Christmas, it lies deep in your heart so let it out - If only for Christmas, you never know it might just carry on to Boxing day and beyond.
Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery and today is a gift, that's why they call it "The Present"