To "BE" 13

As we approach the end of another year and move into an even numbered one it is always a time for reflection, to look back and forward, to make plans in our heads, to see our faults of the past and to learn a little more about ourselves, its the night we all jump up and down, let off fireworks, drink, eat and be merry and focus on the ending of one thing and the starting of another!  By doing this, the day itself becomes somewhat forgotten, unlike most other days of the year it is left to be nothing more than a stepping stone forward or a viewing point backwards, we rarely sit in it and take it as a special day.
 

I am going to use my New Years Eve as a time of reflection and to sit in the "What is" rather than the "What has been" or the unreality of "What could be" it is something I have rarely done before but I am going to try and practise it tonight and many nights moving forward.....
 

We can use up so much of our energy and time looking forward and backwards its easy to forget what is going on around us right now, I have been guilty of this so many times before and it truly is the waste of a day, an hour, a minute or even a moment.

I sat on my sofa last night with my wife, my daughter and my dog, we watched "Mr Stink" by a roaring fire and it was peaceful, full of love and free, I am so very very blessed to have health, a family and happiness in my life and heart, it has been a lifetime searching for it thinking it was many other things than just having the simple things.

It really is the little things that are so special in life but the things we can all so easily overlook, so busy are we running to the next goal or sitting in resentment of what has gone. It's the "Now" that is so important, so just for today and hopefully moving forward lets all try and sit in the "Now" Practice not perfection!
 

I used to always say in my head on NYE "This is going to be my year" however the bit I sometimes forgot was not one dream, hope or ambition will materialise without effort, determination, persistence, self sacrifice, positive energy and the big one "Action" and then yet more "Action"
To be in the "Now" we have to put in the action to feel it, realise it and embrace it! To feel the power of now we HAVE to freely give of ourselves.

Dreams, hopes, targets and goals simply remain just that without putting in at least a modicum of action, this is my lesson for myself and it something that has taken a long time to learn and more importantly practise.
 

It reminds me of a great story a friend from America told me called Danny of a man who met God.
 

The man said to God "Can I please win the lottery?" Of course you can" Said God after seeing the man had good plans and ideas for using the money.

The man returned to earth and after a year he had not won a penny nor a dime, he returned to God and said "You are a liar, you promised me I would win the lottery!" God took the mans hand and said "You have to meet me half way and buy a ticket!"

Time now for me to spend some uninterrupted time with my two girls and to head off into 2014 a man ready to embrace life on life's terms. 2013 has been a year of much pain, much growth and much learning of self, I have been to the lowest point but I would not be sitting in my peace today without having made that journey, it is one journey I intend not to ever make again, for me its about being in the now and putting in the action to move upwards and onwards full of life and laughter, joy and happiness, love and respect and most importantly freedom to be who I want to be NOT what others want me to be!

Thank YOU for being such an important part of my life this year, writing has helped me escape much pain and given me hope to move forward, I am so very grateful to you all for taking the time to read my words.

Thank you also to those who stood bye me, carried me, held me, advised me, loved me and truly cared for me during 2013, you know who you are! And for those who did the opposite, you approval today is not needed nor sought, I left "People pleasing" behind a while back now! What you think of me is none of my business nor am I going to spend any energy justifying myself or changing to fit how you want me to be or act, if that upsets you so much, that's your stuff, not mine!

Have a safe beautiful evening and a very happy New Year and if only for a second just stop, live in the minute and just "Be"

Happy New Year you lovely lot!

Roycey.